Earlier this week there was a news story about student cheating at Stanford. This was followed up with examples of other cheating at most of our college campuses. When interviewed, most students attitudes were " everybody cheats, in life and everything else so it's not a big deal". I can hardly blame our current crop of future leaders for having this attitude. Just think about the past 20+ years and the list of politicians that have cheated on their wives, husbands, expense accounts, taxes and credentials. We have had religious leaders convicted as pedophiles, scam artist and hypocrites of their own preachings. We have had law enforcement individuals convicted of taking and offering bribes. Teachers and school coaches have been convicted of having sex with underage students. Court Judges profiting from their legal decisions. Leaders on Wall Street cheating their investors, financial advisers stealing from their friends and clients, corporations selling dangerous products from cars to food in order to satisfy their own greed. Banks and Savings and Loans that prey on susceptible borrowers. Now, this morning, we are told that the Better Business Bureau has been caught SELLING their highest ratings to businesses that pay the most money. To have this lack of integrity, honor and ethics become the norm for our great country is ,I feel, due to the complacency of the masses. When it started is hard to identify, ( Watergate scandal, Monica Lewinsky, a fake war??) but it will not end until we demand a higher level of behavior from our leaders and ourselves. Let's all take inventory of our own actions and pledge to neither act in nor accept unscrupulous behavior.

Things are not getting any better for our economy and, as usual, it is the the middle class that is shrinking more and more. All the companies that were saved by our tax dollars are doing just fine and seem to be making profits once again. To celebrate, they reward their management with large bonus checks. Meanwhile, the banks are refusing to lend money to the average taxpayer. It will come as no surprise when the Democrats lose and lose big in the November election. Our entire economic melt down was caused by the finance industry and their greedy culture but it is the average taxpayer that continues to pay the price. Our government has not held them accountable to any degree and bailed them out without any conditions attached.

On another subject, I would like to know when our country changed from being the "land of the free" to the "land of the free ride". There has been more money spent on protecting the illegal alien than on helping the average citizen get through these tough economic times. This past week I saw an article about some illegal workers here in California complaining that they are not being paid as much as legal citizens. They claim that they do not get overtime and are required to work more than eight hours a day. I think the answer to this is simple, slap the employer with a very hefty fine and send all the illegal workers back to their country where I am sure they will be treated better than here.

This country has been turned upside down. The corporate culture is one of greed and corruption. Ethics, honor, fairness and integrity have become vanishing characteristics in the leaders of industry and government. Double speak is the norm and character is no longer an admired trait.

It has been a while since my last posting but the life of a retiree is action packed to say the least. I have had to endure the frustration of an exceedingly
large tax bill, I have fallen twice, once at my daughters when we were walking and once from a ladder when I was trying to install a solar shade for my container garden. In addition, my back started acting up again so I have reacquainted myself with the Chiropractor.Now, let's move on to the more important items affecting our lives.

The level of greed from corporations coupled with the level of corruption within our government continues to negatively impact the working citizen. The latest example is, of course, the oil spill in the Gulf. Information continues to leak out at a lesser rate than the oil but no less of an impact to our lives. It seems this latest disaster was caused by BP trying to cut corners in their maintenance responsibilities. In addition, it seems that Halli Burton was involved through their ship-shod work on the concrete portion of the well. You remember Halli Burton, the company with whom our previous Vice President was intimately involved. Even though the oil disaster has grabbed the major portion of the headlines, it did not go unnoticed that Johnson & Johnson has been cited for poor quality control of it's plants which has resulted in a recall of several of its over the counter drugs.

So, let's review, top banks, investment companies, insurance companies, oil companies, drug companies, auto manufacturers, coal mining companies and most likely others that I cannot remember at this moment, have let their greed override their responsibility for safety and ethics to the public and their employees. They have been able to do this in large, very large, part because of the lack of regulations put upon them by our Government. The reduction in oversight and regulations began when Ronald Regan was President. It is not that his idea was bad, it is just that it grew under his and all succeeding Presidents. The lobbyists for these industries began to enjoy unprecedented access and influence among our elected politicians. Now that the results of this deregulation has reached epic and negative proportions and Washington is trying to implement some regulations back on these industries, they are calling "foul" and crying that it will hurt business overall. This bunch of soulless, dishonorable, greedy, unethical, leeches doesn't want the government to have any oversight of their business but want their lobbyist to have unfettered access to the bunch of weak willed, unethical, greedy, vapid, dishonorable, leeches we have voted into office. Now I am really upset!!!

I was watching a program on television recently in which some prostitutes were being arrested. This got me thinking about how many people call this a victimless crime. I admit, I have agreed with this thinking because it is a contract between two consenting adults. My thinking was that if it were to be legalized there would be no need for "pimps", no need for taxpayer money to be spent on the legal process and a ton of money to be generated by taxing this profession. In addition, jobs would be generated by some of the rules and regulations of this new business requiring health insurance, liability insurance and various permits. I know that there are lots of other issues to consider but rather than go into deeper issues I just wanted to share what next came to mind.

I am struck with the thought that prostitution already is one of the largest, ongoing industries in this country and one that has been condoned for years although not in the fashion which most commonly comes to mind. I am thinking more along the lines of our government. We have two major "pimps" or "madams" in this industry, the Republican and Democratic Parties. The actual "prostitutes" are our elected officials and last but not least, the "johns" are the lobbyist. They pay the prostitutes to deliver the goods and our elected officials do so for the benefit of the "pimps/madams". Now, back to this crime being victimless. This crime has more victims than any other crime on the books. The victims are every taxpaying citizen in this country whether they vote or not. Instead of our elected officials, " prostitutes" it is we, the taxpaying citizens that are being screwed. We have been sold out at every level, federal, state and local. What can we do? The simple answer is to organize, unite and fight back. How do we do it? I am not sure, and I am certainly not savvy or connected enough to get anything started but I will be looking for some group, organization or individual that I can join and lend any type of talent I might have to help them.

Our cousins from Tucson have been with us for the past week. Mama P met Linda and Gene in Parker and we all drove back to Ca. together. Gene has been in construction his entire life so the intent was to have him do some things for us around the house. We have no problem taking advantage of any friend or relative that has a talent we can use. Actually Gene enjoys being taken advantage of but his is more of the "fantasy" version. You can only imagine his disappointment when he realized he was to be a beast of burden instead of a "Boy Toy".

As with most plans, ours changed on a daily basis. With the exception of Mama M, we are all retired so, like a bunch of teenagers, we try to avoid anything that resembles work. The first day, we decided to head to L.A. and do the tourist thing. Our youngest, Brooke, surprised us by changing her work schedule so she could spend the day with us. We picked her up and went to Hermosa Beach for breakfast at Scotty's Cafe. Due to road construction, we had to park a couple of blocks away but the day was so nice we did not mind the walk. We put Brooke in charge of taking care of us since she is still young and not prone to mental lapses. She failed her first test by allowing us to miss the walk signal twice because we were distracted by the sights and our conversation. Of course we can't blame Brooke too much, after all she is Blonde.

When we returned to the car we found and unpleasant surprise ******* a parking ticket!! Not one of us noticed the sign posted on the parking meter that stated " No Parking on Thursdays" even though we were all crowded around the meter putting in coins. We again decided it was Brookes' fault since we all have poor vision.

We put it behind us and headed to Rodeo Drive. We walked all over the place gazing at things we couldn't afford, did not like or could not fit into. Gene spent most of his time gazing longingly at the plethora of luxury cars passing by on the street. Linda found a few things she could not live without but really now, isn't that what life is all about???

We left Rodeo Drive and headed to Grauman's for the ritual hand/feet comparison. It had turned quite a bit cooler as the afternoon passed but that did not stop Linda from laying on the sidewalk next to the star for Michael Bolton. Most of the time, I would make fun of people that do that but since she is my cousin how could I do that. I will always defend her right to make a fool of herself in public because I love her.

We also stopped at Farmers Market where Brooke bought a Caramel Apple that was so big it had it's own Zip Code. While we were there we picked up a hot drink at Starbucks. Mama M, Linda and Brooke walked to the Grove where they checked out the American Girl shop. Evidently one of the sales ladies mistook Brooke for a 15 year old and was critical of her mother for allowing her to drink coffee at that young age. She was shocked that Brooke was almost 21. Evidently this sales lady does not pay attention to what is going on in the world as most 15 year olds today have children already. Mama M took it as a compliment that she looked young enough to have a 15 year old. Oh yeah, it's all about Mama M !!

We ended up at the Grand Luxe Cafe. Their food is always good but their Benoits are the best. Around the end of the day Stacey called. When she asked us what places we had been to we couldn't remember!!! We thought our Ace in the hole would be Brooke but sadly, she had contracted the old age disease of CRS because she could not remember either.

Of course a day in L.A. would not be complete without a driving incident. On our way to the freeway, a *&%#@$!! driver cut across us diagonally causing Mama P to slam on the brakes, lay on the horn and spew a length of profanity that continues to this very day when the subject comes up.

Okay, gotta go. We have had our walk for the day and I need to take a shower and get ready to meet some friends for lunch. I will Blog more tomorrow about the rest of their visit.

Parent Abandonment

I will never understand parents that can leave their children for any reason other than death. I can't imagine shirking my responsibility as a parent because it would make my life so much easier. That's what my father chose to do when I was 8 and my brother was 10 years old. He remarried, had two stepsons and he and his new wife had another son and daughter. We were never invited to spend the night at their new house. We shared a few holidays with his new family but it was clear as I looked at the gifts his new children had opened that Christmas morning that we were not in the same category as these new kids. My older brother and I were given one gift to open, shared a meal and taken home. I remember clearly feeling that we did not fit in. As the years went on we rarely saw my dad and no longer expected phone calls let alone a gift for our birthdays. But being blessed with resilience life went on and my brother and I grew up as happy and active children eventually getting married, having children and enjoying successful careers. I called my dad on father's day and his birthday for many years. I would see him on the occasional family gathering or holiday. When my dad and his wife retired they moved quite a distance away making contact even more difficult.
I grew up wanting a real dad like many of my friends had. They had dads that were loving, caring, supportive and would help them during the tough times. But mostly I wanted a dad that would talk to me with respect and in a positive manner. I prayed for that every night. Finally, I gave up. I built up my defense mechanisms and life went on. I have three fabulous children, a great partner, a loving mom, fabulous family and friends, as well as a successful career. I count my blessings daily. I rarely hang on to the past and don't put myself into the victim category.
But now here is my discovery. My dad wants back in my life. I was actually excited that perhaps my prayer was finally going to be answered. He is now 78 years old and his wife had passed away. Was I really going to have my real dad back after 45 years? Well, the answer is not really. First,he admitted that he is reaching out out of guilt. So that says to me that he is doing this for himself not to make anything up to me. Then, he blames his wife for the many years of neglect instead of taking responsibility for his own actions. Finally, it has been brought to my attention that my brother and I will not be in his will because he gave my mother the house when they divorced(His words). Mind you this was 45 years ago and he also left my mother the mortgage. He also paid my mother 45 dollars a month for child support. But of course his other son and daughter will be listed in his will. I have never harbored any negative feelings towards my half sister and brother. I actually like them and care about them. But my dad's words and actions were another slap in my face and a huge dose of reality. I don't need his money but this is evidence that he doesn't care about me. As far as I'm concerned he is leaving me at the side of the curb again. I give up again. My expectations are no more.
I just received a phone call today. It was my dad wanting to meet me(alone)for dinner this weekend. Should I just let this elderly man talk while I enjoy a meal or should I tell him exactly how I feel? He has a heart condition. Is it worth my energy? This is unwanted drama. I like my calm, sometimes crazy life with all of the people that I already have in it. I don't know what I'm going to say but I do know that parents that leave their children for half assed reasons leave a tiny scar for that child's entire life. The scar can be covered so that life can be enjoyed but it pops out every so often to remind you of the kind of person you never want to be.

We are still walking and have managed to work our way up to 2 miles per day. I takes us about an hour but the difficulty is increasing as we try to find streets that go up hill. I am not saying we are official street walkers but we are quite a sight. Mama M usually wears a sweatshirt, a knitted watch cap, gloves and a jacket with a hood. I normally wear a tee shirt, a jacket and a baseball cap on bad hair days only. Some people might say everyday is a bad hair day for me but as long as I don't look like Gumby, I am okay walking without the hat.

After our walk this morning, Mama M took a shower and went to run errands. I did some yard work, including trimming the palms, putting down weed cloth and covering it with the new rubberized mulch. I am so sore and stiff that I don't know if I can make it up the stairs tonight. Mama M might need to wrap a rope around me and drag me up the stairs.

We are trying to see all 10 of the Oscar nominated movies before Oscar night. We have seen 3 so far and here is our opinion on those.

Avatar
We LOVED it!!! We sprung for the extra $3.50 to see it in 3D and it was worth every penny. It is hard to believe that James Cameron envisioned this amazing movie down to having a botanist name all of the vegetation in the movie.

Up In The Air
Another George Clooney movie where he plays George Clooney. We really do not understand how this one got into the running.

The Hurt Locker
We enjoyed this movie even though it is hard to watch. It really looks more like a documentary than a Hollywood movie. It makes it difficult not to have strong negative feelings about the citizens in Iraq. I have to remember that we have people in this country who might react the same way if we were invaded by another country.

We have also seen Julie and Julia, Crazy Heart and It's Complicated.

By far, the movie we have enjoyed the most was It's Complicated. This movie is laugh-out-loud funny.

Julie and Julia is a cute movie to watch but I am not sure that male viewers would enjoy it as much.

Crazy Heart is like a generic version of A Star is Born, the Country Music version. Jeff Bridges does a great job but the story was predictable.